Something to Look Forward To

And just in time too!  Matt and I have been wanting to get away.....away from pretty much everything life is throwing at us and go away together.  Just the two of us. Because frankly its been a really long time since we have and it is very much needed.  


In our planning for a trip I get a call from one of my dearest/closest friends Courtney.  Courtney has been planning on getting married to her boyfriend of 8 or so years but neither can agree on any part of the wedding.  


None of it.  


Who to invite, where to have it....NOTHING.  


So she says


Hey! Since I'm pregnant and all......We are getting married.  In three weeks.  In Vegas.  We would like for you and Matt to come and if you cant I understand, but I wanted to throw it out there.  I got lost on the way to your shot gun wedding so I would understand if you can't make it to mine. 


She is the only other person I know who "accidentally" got pregnant.


Twice.


Besides me...of course.


Now Courtney knows all too well how Matt and I do not save money.  We are horrible about having some extra money and spending it before our bank account knew what hit it.  


We got our tax return and it was a pretty nice amount.


So...Vegas here we come.

Five glorious kid-free days!


I am beside myself with excitement.

What Ever You Do....Don't Write a Check!

Ok world.  If you are still writing checks as a form of payment...you should be shot.

Seriously.

I swear...If I get behind one more old lady paying with a check at WalMart again, I just might go postal on her!

Because you can't just write a check, confirm your drivers license number, and move on your way.

Nope.

Now you don't write on the check at all! 

In this day of technology you don't write a check anymore. You just give them a blank check, they feed it through the check feeder thingy, you look at it, confirm that it is the right amount, and sign the little screen thingy.  

Transaction done.

For anyone under the age of 65 that is.

For an old person it is broken down more like this,

Attempt to write your check while the cashier is trying to tell you not to write on the check. 

Wait for it to register to above said old person that you are handing someone a blank check....a blank check to your account...giving them total access to your life, money, social security money, retirement and what ever else you might hold near and dear! Oh hellllllll no! 

But somehow the cashier is convincing (never mind the line that has collected in the checkout and about 5 sets of eyes glaring their way) and the old person feels the pressure and hands over the blank check.

The cashier fumbles with the check.

Wait some more.

And then they have to dig for their drivers license and show proof of who they are.  The cashier has to explain that they sign the screen thingy instead of their check as they are still fumbling with their license!

All the while I have 3 kids at a checkout....grabbing last minute crap and trying to either break it or stick it in the basket.  And it is the inevitable that one will have to pee....NOW.

I'm pissed at this point and am about ready to pay for the old lady's crap myself just to move her along.  

The kicker is.... the cashier hands the lady back her check.

DAMN IT!!

Because you know the gal is REALLY confused now! After an explanation from the very patient cashier the lady is finally done.

FINALLY!

10 minutes later.

Jeeezzz US! Check writing should be banned, outlawed, refused....by every business!  

But then people like my mother would be lost and not know how the hell they are supposed to pay their bills....save the stamp and use online bill pay.  But teaching her how to do it is quite another story.  I still have to walk her through using the remote control!

My (not so) Little Man

My little man turned 8 on Saturday.


It, quite frankly, broke my heart.


He is getting older.  Becoming his own "person".


Does this growing up thing get any better?


Am I going to feel like this every year until he is 30?


Am I going to feel like this every time the other two celebrate a birthday?


I pretty sure the answer is YES.  Sigh.


I wonder if all moms feel this way on their children's birthday.  I wonder if they can replay the day of their childs birth... like I do mine at various times throughout their birth day.  I find myself thinking at different times during the day of just what Matt and I were doing when he was born.


Yeah I'm a bit crazy...


5:00 am head to the hospital.


5:15 stop at Whataburger so Matt can eat in front of me
 *side note...I was terrified to eat anything the day before being induced for fear I might have to poop.  Its true.  I was so scared that they were going to give me an enema that I tried to outsmart the system.  I thought If I don't eat, yes a 9 month pregnant woman trying to abstain from food, I wouldn't have anything in my system to flush out, therefore avoiding the dreaded enema.  So I didn't eat that morning before giving birth.  I wish I had because they gave me the enema anyway.  And it wasn't so bad. Not like the horror that I had envisioned. 


5:16 Get a call from my friend Courtney, who had been on a drunken good time all night, and talk her out of meeting us at the hospital in 15 minutes.


5:20 Keep talking to Courtney hoping she would rationalize what she was trying to do.  Suceed and hang up as we arrive at Labor and Delivery.


7:30 petocin and contractions


11:30 request epidural and get it.


12:00 inlaws show up and hang out while I watch the John Edwards Show and try to explain to my mother what exactly he does.


2:30 the doctor comes in and tells me I need a c-section


3:11 Tyler is born


The rest of the day is a blur of emotions, family, and friends


10:45 I hold my son for the first time. ( I was pissed it took this long to bring me my baby! I think it was because I wasn't breastfeeding and they were taking their sweet damn time)

I remember just how I felt at that very moment and emotion overcomes me even now when I think about it.  I always knew that I would be a mother but I didn't know just how it would make me feel.  

Now he is 8.  

Half way to driving.  WTH?

He is the best kid.  He is thoughtful, considerate, caring, and thank god he got my sense of humor!  

He loves to laugh and cut up and I think it is his mission in life to hear his sister giggle.  The are the best of friends and I love to hear the little voice come from the back seat of the car, "I love you Ty" and he returns the sentiment with an, "I love you more Raegan"!  

I cant wait to see what the future holds for my sweet Little Man but my heart breaks as the years go by because I know that in the future he will not be all mine. 

Sigh.

Some Things

I have not posted in a long time.


I don't feel bad....I just have had a lot going on.


So it calls for a list cause there is just too much to say.


1.  I love living in Lubbock...I finally feel like I am home, but the social aspects are killing me! ha!  Don't get me wrong, I love being close to my closest friends and family but I have been used to being on my "island" for 7 years with a lacking/selective social life.  So the shock of my brother coming over...just when ever, game night with friends, or going to my parents house just whenever I want is still taking some getting used to.  I love all of these things, that is not what I am saying, but I am not used to having so much going on! I love it....but it is taking some getting used to.  Hell it is taking some getting used to being with Matt every night and every lunch!


2.  I finally have people to cook for other than Aunt Meggy and Matt! And it is people who love food just as much as I do!


3.  I have started eating healthier.  Matt and I both.  I have since lost 4lbs in one week, now if I can just fit in the dreaded workout regimen I will be in good shape!


4.  Tyler is having some trouble adjusting to a new school, and I think I am having trouble adjusting to his new teacher.  She is.....well....ok.  I don't much care for the woman and she definitely hasn't done anything to make Tyler feel welcome in his new class.  I just don't think she will ever measure up to the AMAZING teacher we left in San Angelo.  Ever.  But I keep pushing him to be more positive and am trying to encourage him as bes as I can.


5.  I am feeling guilty that I have not called some of our friends that live here.  Our close friends....I don't know why I keep putting it off! I guess it is a little of #1 and my own procrastination issues.


6.  I love this house.  LOVE IT!  I will take pictures soon.


7.  My back is KILLING me.  I know it is because of gaining about 15lbs over the past 4 months.  I eat when I am stress, and this move hasn't made it any easier.  I am the fattest I have ever been.  I hate it and I know it is why my back is hurting so much.  I don't sleep at night and it is starting to take a toll on me.


8.  My baby is not sleeping very well again.  It is hit or miss with her sleep patterns.  I think I got up about 4 times last night and that was after going to sleep at 12:30.  It makes me miserable.  I should be able to just put her to bed at night and she drifts off to sleep and doesn't wake up until I'm ready for her to right? WRONG! I think the moon and stars have to be aligned just perfect and her left foot positioned just a certain way and her blanket sitting a certain way on her body....I could go on.  It is a bitch to put her to sleep at night and a bitch to wake up with her at night.  I have gotten into the habit of sticking a bottle in her mouth because I am so tired and don't want to have to jack with getting her back to sleep.  You would think that a 10 month old wouldn't' be waking up in the night and needing a bottle...but she does.  damn.


9.  Raegan started a new preschool that is absolutely AMAZING! I love it there and so does she! 3 days a week from 9 to noon! It is simply fantastic and she has a great teacher....it is truly a godsend that we got in there! They just happened to have one opening...and we got it! YAY! Thanks to my cousin, because without her I don't think we would have gotten the spot.


10.  Read this.... it kind of tell how I feel right now! I really relate to this woman and LOVE her stories...she is hysterical!


11.  I am so glad to be in the same town as my brother.  We have gotten so close and I appreciate all of the time we have gotten to spend together.  I absolutely adore his new wife and can not wait to see what the future holds for them.


12.  I am so glad to be so close to my best friend...both in distance and personally.  She is the best, and something about being in the same town makes it so much easier to pick up the phone and just "chat"!  She gets me better than anybody.  We have been pretty inseparable for the past  20+ years and I am so thankful to have her in my life!


13.  I love having Matt here any old time I want him.  It was really hard for those months to be separate while we sold the house.  I am so thankful for all of the time we have together now both alone and as a family.

Elated

One of my dearest friends had a baby yesterday.  

I was on edge from the time I woke up until I heard the news that Giada Renee had made her appearance into this world.  

Without me to be there.  

Cause everyone knows how I hate to miss ANYTHING.

But.....THIS...I had no choice.

So I waited.  Waited to hear that everything went ok.  That Mom, and especially baby were good.

You see I am 5 hours away.  And it is killing me.  Because when someone close to you has a baby for the first time, and you are a veteran at having babies (because you have 3), you feel like you need to be there.  Be there to tell them everything that no one told you.  

Things like how to keep you boobs from swelling cause you are not going to breastfeed, that you CAN wear your own pjs instead of the fashionable hospital gown, that you can take you OWN bottles to the hospital (and use them), that you can put your baby in any ol' outfit you want (cause she is yours)...you know? 

Things like that.  

But no.

I am here.  

In Lubbock.  Hoping that someone is there....there to tell her exactly what to do when her sweet little angel baby cries.  

Sigh   

Its one of those situations where life is going on...without you.  And there is nothing you can do about it.  

Bleh.

Why do I always have this incessant urge to be a part of EVERYTHING that happens to EVERYONE close to me?

Needless to say....she is beautiful.  Head full of red hair.  And deep down...I hope it stays that way.  Because redheads, as you know, have free spirits.  Are headstrong and full of personality....are the most fun people in the world.

I should know.

I am one. HA!

And I would love nothing more than this child to fill their hearts and lives full of more joy than you can imagine.  Because I don't think they know just what is in store for them, and what a child is going to bring to their lives. I don't think either one of them has felt joy like that in their lives.  And I cant wait to see them go through it.  

Especially with one another.

Being a parent is the single most amazing thing you will ever do in your entire life.

I think the world of Kyle and Kristina and I can't wait to watch their sweet Giada grow.

Just perfect.